hing! I was weak. I was…evil. And when I looked at you, I was afraid. I thought, What if you turned out like me? What if I ruined you, too? What if you hated me for what I’d done? Maybe you’d be better off without me. Maybe… if I took myself to the grave, you’d have a chance to be better, to be stronger than I ever was.”(不!我不值得被原谅!我说的话……不是想开脱任何事!我……弱,我……我邪恶。当我看到你,我……我好怕……我记得我在想:如果你和我一样怎么办?如果我毁了你怎么办?如果你因为我的事而恨我怎么办?或许没有我,你会成长得更好。或许……如果我把自己带坟墓里,你才有机会成长为一个比我更好,更的人。)
汤姆的声音沉得比刚才更低:“You thought leaving me alone in an orphanage would make me stronger? You thought that was love? Do you know the kind of life I had there?”(你以为把我留在孤儿院能让我更好、更?!你以为那就是?!你知我在那里经受了什么吗!?)
梅洛普更加焦急,微微向前倾,珠急切地打转:“No, Tom! It wasn’t love. It was fear. It was guilt. I was so consumed by what I’d done, by what I was, that I couldn’t see anything else. Not even you. And I will carry that regret with me for the rest of my existence.”(不,不,汤姆!那不是,而是恐惧,是愧疚。我被我犯的罪行吞噬了,被我是何等样人的意识吞噬了,其余的……我什么也望不见……连你也几乎望不见。我永远、永远都要浸溺在遗憾、恐惧、愧疚里……)
汤姆默默凝望梅洛普——那个他以为遗弃、憎恨、背叛他的母亲,此时如此不堪一击,晦暗的灵被悔恨与自责压得匍伏在地……匍伏在他脚边。